For some people it is so easy to get to know others. They just attract the attention. Gain respect immediately. Their present is felt. They are being listened. How do they do that? Are you one of them?
Do you like being around people who complain all the time? Who are never happy with what they have? Always wry face, never smiling, always some negative comments… Does it sound appealing to you? I bet it doesn’t. If it does though, then it’s high time to think why you are NOT a people magnet and if you want to change it.. But let’s focus on positivity. Why is it so important? Why are we so much drawn to it?Maybe there is something naïve about thinking that the glass is always full or as my beloved the Beatles song goes ‘tomorrow may rain, but I’ll follow the sun’. Maybe being too much of an idealist is not healthy; in the end you need to keep the balance. If people feel optimism and positivity around you, they will stick to you. Such confidence and attitude gives others the feeling of safety and takes them away from problems. Positive people are always able to find a good way and potentially a solution, or just a temporary solution to any issues. They won’t be focusing on the problem here and now, but will think about the resolution and how to react. They also point out the advantages and lessons learnt from the experience.
So why we love positive people? – because they won’t let you drown and will always do their best to put a smile on your face.
Being trustworthy and loyal to your friends and other people – of course. How simple is that? Is it something that attracts people – not long term. In the end, what really brings people attention and will make them want to be close to you is being trustworthy with yourself. You have decided to travel on your own – a month ago you were following the unknown in Asia? You were talking about moving abroad – and there you are in Spain two months after? Or losing 10kg in a year – your body in bikini now looks… super hot?! That’s what people love. That’s what people appreciate.
You can be supportive to others. You can lead them, guide them, but without being the example yourself and showing that you are following your decisions yourself – you will not gain their full respect and for sure you won’t be a human magnet.
Being self-aware. Personally, I am quite aware person. What do I mean by that – being sure that I’m perfect? Of course not! I perfectly know my strengths, but even more my weaknesses. I don’t excuse myself from those, but focus on improving them. I won’t pretend if I don’t know something, but I also won’t feel bad about it. In the end we are not Eintsteins in all fields and we don’t hold PhD in every faculty, so just be genuine. On the other hand, I won’t pretend that I don’t know how to do something if I do… only because I don’t want to seem to be a show off or overconfident. If I know something, why not use it? People like surround themselves with confident people. People who are confident with their weak and strong points. People who can say ‘I can’t do it’ and be comfortable with it, but also the ones that will say ‘I can do it and I can show this to you now.’ Doesn’t it give you the feeling that they are honest with you but more importantly with themselves? I think this is something that we are really seeking for in our times. Unfortunately, I have noticed that the world around us is full of overconfident people that do not know their weaknesses or people who will underestimate themselves in every area.
Did you really think that the more you say YES the more people will be around you? You couldn’t be further from reality. Something that attracts people is actually having the balls to say NO. Why? Because not many people can do that. So many of us is scared to say no to our friends, at work, to family or on the bus to that really rude lady bothering everyone… Why are we scared? – read the first sentence. Why shouldn’t be scared? – read the third sentence. You should be confident with yourself. Listen to your guts. Having said that, if you feel like saying NO, just say it! People will appreciate it and will again feel safe next to you.
Most of us likes being around people who listen, are not scared to share their ideas, are full of energy, self-aware, able to accept their mistakes and in a way inspire us. Some of us has this inborn talent, others need to learn it. Is it possible? Yes! You can consciously develop your inner strength and become a human magnet. Believe in yourself first and then let people believe in you.
Do I know any human magnets? Yes – 1st my Mum and 2nd my Best Friend. They both have all features above and definitely work like magnets to me.